Crossfit Empower members came through in multitudes, donating above and beyond the $2500
threshold for the Equipment Fundraiser. Crossfit Empower and B.C. Children’s Hospital thanks you for
all your generous donations. Crossfit Empower has purchased more new equipment thanks to YOU!
…Oh wait, something is happening…We are receiving a perplexing transmission for Crossfit Empower members only…
In another dimension not too far from here, Sandman pulls a long dark hood around his head (you can never have too many pitch-black flowing cloaks). With his mysterious powers, he summons a little bird
that flies through the window and alights on the sleeve of his black cloak. The bird whistles a tune in his
ear singing of how a handful of members as they donated to the Equipment Fund, said “Suck it
Sandman.” Or thought, ‘I’m going to stick it to that Sandman’. The words of “I’m going to beat that
Sandman. I’m going to hit him where it hurts,” reverberates in his ears as he presses his gnarled hands
together.
He grabs that bird reveling in the taunts and insults, feeling his powers grow. He almost squeezes the
life out of that scrappy little bird, but alas that puny minion may be useful in the future, so he lets him
fly away back to his hovel.
Sandman turns to the window overlooking his empire and throws back his head in dark glee and cackles
to the four corners of the earth, “For every extra rep completed, every second saved, every technique
improved, every athlete inspired, every coach made better, and every dollar donated, my powers only grow stronger. You have succumbed to the dark side!”
