Understanding the 4 Quadrants: The Real Reason Your Resolutions Fail
Thanks to Dan John for another useful insight!
Have you ever set goals that you failed to follow through on? For example, did you promise yourself on December 31st that starting tomorrow you would turn over a new leaf, replace your bad habits with good habits and finally become the you that you have always dreamed of becoming?
And maybe you even followed through for a week or two. Or more likely a day or two. And next December 31st there you were, the same person as the year before, none of your goals achieved. Why does that happen?
When working with athletes, Dan John has a 4 quadrant system for uncovering potential roadblocks to success and it is something you can employ yourself to maximize the likelihood that you are fully prepared to accomplish your desired outcomes.
The first two quadrants probably look familiar to you:
1) How will your life improve when you achieve your goal?
Imagine how good you will feel. Imagine what this will enable you to do. Imagine who you will become. For most of us, this is the easy part, it’s the daydream we spend much of our time living in instead of taking action to get there.
2) How will your life be worse if you do not reach your goal?
Also easy. It will probably resemble the discontent you are living in now that motivated you to set the goal in the first place plus the additional disappointment at having yet again failed to achieve your stated goal.
You have probably explored these two quadrants in previous goal setting exercises. Maybe they worked but in my experience, most of the time they don’t. And Dan John has insightfully intuited the reason the first two questions are insufficient to guarantee positive results. It is because they do not address the underlying internal resistance that stymies your efforts to enact real, meaningful change. These are best addressed by questions 3 and 4 of Dan John’s goal setting quadrants:
3) How will your life get worse when you achieve your goal?
I bet you never gave this much thought, did you? At least not consciously. Your subconscious mind, on the other hand, has been working around the clock to sabotage your best intentions because it knows that change is hard. What will it mean if you have to let go of your self-limiting beliefs? Who would you then have to become? It’s an uncomfortable thought. I have at least two friends who, when they realized they found themselves on the cusp of becoming world class competitors in their sport, decided instead to walk away from sport altogether. It was easier and more comfortable than having to forge the new identity of a world champion. Maybe it's as basic as having to give away all your favourite clothes and buy new ones when you shrink out of your current wardrobe. Change is hard. Even change for the better. Are you really ready for it? Because if you are not, if even a small part of your mind is resistant, it will be much easier to just stay the same. And, if you’re like most of us, for the large part, that’s generally what you have done to date.
4) How will your life be better if you do not achieve your goal?
It’s a real kicker to realise this but, in many ways, your life will be easier and more comfortable if you resist the desire to change for the better and just settle for remaining in your current condition. This way you can avoid the discomfort that change inevitably entails. Why does someone remain in an unhappy or abusive relationship? Because changing your residence, your social circle, your financial stability, are massive and frightening upheavals that may loom larger than the occasional familiar mistreatment by a romantic partner. It is easy for us to judge when we see others avoiding changing their sub optimal circumstances but what about you? What form of self abuse are you tolerating in order to avoid the discomfort of change?
If you really want to make a change in a specific area of your life, take the time to get clear on what it really means for you and what obstacles you will have to overcome in order to succeed. Not just the external obstacles, but the more powerful and insidious internal resistance to change. It’s not simply a question of who you will need to become but who you will need to give up being.
Make a plan that includes not just what you need to do to achieve the goals you have set for yourself but also what internal obstacles to change you will encounter. Will your new eating plan put you in the awkward position of turning down birthday cake at social gatherings? Will your exercise commitment require you to give up your Thursday evening streaming shows? It is not enough to have a goal, you must formulate a plan that anticipates the real challenges associated with achieving your goal and how to overcome them.
Employ Dan John’s goal setting quadrants to help you finally make the transformation you’ve been promising yourself your whole life!
Make Up Day
1) Empower Reset #34
3 mins Navy SEAL Breathing
30/30 sec head nods/rotations
3 rounds:
1 min Deadbugs
1 min Glute Bridges
1 min Windshield Wipers
2/2 mins Upper/Lower Body Rolls
3 rounds:
1 min Scap Rocks
1 min Bird Dogs
1 min Elevated Rocks
3 mins Frog Rolls
3 rounds:
1 min Full Body Rocks
1 min Cross Crawl March
1 min Figure 8’s
2 mins Squat Hold
3 Rounds:
1 min Forward/Backward Bear Crawl
1 min Forward/Backward Crab Walks
1 min Side to Side Monkey Crawls
1 min each:
Egg Rolls
Rocking Chairs
2) 150 burpees
150 wall-ball shots
3) 5 rounds for total reps:
1-minute shuttle run
1-minute rope climb to 15 feet
1-minute hang power snatches
1-minute rest